I Survived…

I survived...

You made me believe it was all my fault

Even at times when the beatings had stopped

I wrote so many "im sorry" letters

I carried too many pressures

I survived your many lies

You begged me to cry

You pulled my hair

I tried to shade the bruising

You didn't even care

You just whispered "you're losing"

I stumbled because I was blind

But in the end, my life I survived

You thought you had power

But I seen you as a coward

Every drunken night my heart was in pieces

Every drunken fight I said I was fucking leaving

My life you effortlessly stolen

Instead I seen you as broken

When I washed my hands of my blood

I told myself you're just misunderstood

Tomorrow will be a different day

He won't give me the same horrible pain

I locked myself in the wardrobe

I had 999 on my mobile phone

I was so scared of moving on

My happy self was lost and gone

I dreamt of being so strong

In the dark I was very wrong

I was powerless in your preying eyes

You hit me with bottles night after night

In the mirror I questioned my fears

And it was the voice of you in my ears

In my lonely nights I heard my screams echo that my scars were real

Jesus Christ how can all of this be real as my heart reminds me I can't feel

Was this the way it was going to be?

Was this my horrific tortured destiny?

HELL NO!!

I still had my soul

A tear shed for me instead of you

I had to let go

You were a monster in my eyes

I climbed from the bottom

I pushed that red button

Alert!

Alert!

Here stands a woman who is now free

No more tears I cry for this ugly beast

Through all of this i can still dream

A monster I survived

I've changed in my life

I survived

Thank God I survived....