A Room Full of Nightmares

When I walk into this room,

I say "this room" because, all of them are the same,

Twitching eyes, judging smiles, wondering what's this mother got to hide,

I am a Mona Lisa, my face tells a million stories, which I protect with my smile,

I feel the people have a mood, my prey, their reflections are my daily life...

Somedays I'm oozing drowsiness, other days I fall in love with loneliness,

Somedays I'm dripping with happiness, other days I'm caged up with sadness,

Some nights I'm wiped out, then I sleep my days away,

Some nights I'm an insomniac, I find it hard for people to relate.

Panic!

Stress!

Anxiety!

Uncontrollable weight loss was a reality,

Sweating!

Trembling!

Agitation!

Feeling these emotions is so exhausting,

Yet here I stand,

A strong, beautiful woman,

Accept me,

Don't accept me,

The thing is...

My heart may break more times than the average person,

Tears may fall heavier than some,

I feel that I'm too soft at times,

But I'm still here being kind!

I'm not a disorder,

I'm not a problem,

With my depression, comes life lessons,

I'm still breathing, for this is a blessing,

A room can be clouded with the darkest people,

A room can be filled with medicated feelings,

This room today is happy, tomorrow it could be crowded by demons,

This room today I'm happy, tomorrow It could be a nightmare,

At the minute I have no filter, this might be a reason I don't really care,

I care about me,

That's not being selfish,

I just care about my well-being.

When I walk into a room, I know now, they're all not the same,

Every room has a door, I can choose to walk out and feel no more pain,

The nightmare isn't real,

I'm real!

I'm beautiful,

I'm strong,

I'm just being me...